Gay Marriage Revisited in 2009

The issue of homosexuality and gay marriage has come up again (first time this year- probably not the last and that's OK- we're open to repeat topics if you've got comments or questions). For more responses to this issue, please see previous posts: The Catholic Church's Opposition to Gay Marriage, Same Sex Couples and the Catholic Church, and Christians and Same Sex Marriage.

Jen D. writes: I am a devout practicing Roman Catholic and I do not believe a gay/lesbian couple being in a monogamous loving relationship who are committed to each other until they are parted by death is immoral, I believe it is a beautiful virtue to be admired. Its also a virtue these people want to adopt children that heterosexuals apparently do not want. What is right and wrong is written on the human heart -between each person and God. Also, love and commitment is always right- can never be wrong or sinful, and covers a multitude of sins. Denying gays/lesbians these human rights (marriage) breaks the moral code to love your neighbor as you love yourself. How can we (Catholics) deny anyone such a right? Love is the most important thing, who cares what sex you are, love is love.

My response: Thanks for writing Jen D. and sharing your thoughts with Connecticut Catholic Corner. Let's be clear. Homosexuals are to be treated with respect and acceptance just like everyone else (see the official Catholic teaching below). The problem is, we humans don't make the rules or decide what is sin and what isn't sin. God does- and He didn't ask our opinions on it. We either accept it or reject it. It's really that simple. It was God who created humans and when he did, he made woman for man. Female for male and created them so that they could procreate. Both the Old Testament and New Testament agree that same sex sexual relationships are sinful TO GOD. That means, it hurts God when these sins are committed. Now it may not personally effect your life or my life, but when anyone sins against God, it hurts God- and that is the whole point. If someone on the other side of the world commits a sin, be it stealing, coveting, murder whatever, it won't effect me personally, but it will hurt God and as a Christian any sin that hurts God should bother us and hurt us because of our relationship with God. I don't know if you have children or not, but if someone hurts my kids, it hurts me because I love my children. God is our Father in Heaven, if one of his children hurts He hurts. Sin hurts mankind. Some sins effect us personally more than others, but all sin hurts us. And same sex relationships are no more sinful than heterosexual sins. All sexual immorality is equally wrong (read 1 Cor. 5 in your bible for more). To accept one and condemn another only makes you a hypocrite. What I mean by that, is society today (especially the media) doesn't seem to make such a big deal out of pre-marital sex or adultery- but watch out if you bring up gay marriage! Shouldn't be like that because its all sinful according to God. But humans are often the pick and choose types and currently gay marriage is the target. Decades ago it was divorce & remarriage and being shunned because you had pre-marital sex. All these sins are forgivable if we are repentant and truly sorry for offending God. He decided what was sin long ago, we have the God given free will to accept His Word or reject it. Which ever you choose to do, will decide your fate.

This is our Roman Catholic Faith:

Catholic Catechism: #2357 Homosexuality refers to relations between men or between women who experience an exclusive or predominant sexual attraction toward persons of the same sex. It has taken a great variety of forms through the centuries and in different cultures. Its psychological genesis remains largely unexplained. Basing itself on Sacred Scripture, which presents homosexual acts as acts of grave depravity, tradition has always declared that "homosexual acts are intrinsically disordered." They are contrary to the natural law. They close the sexual act to the gift of life. They do not proceed from a genuine affective and sexual complementarity. Under no circumstances can they be approved.

#2358 The number of men and women who have deep-seated homosexual tendencies is not negligible. This inclination, which is objectively disordered, constitutes for most of them a trial. They must be accepted with respect, compassion, and sensitivity. Every sign of unjust discrimination in their regard should be avoided. These persons are called to fulfill God's will in their lives and, if they are Christians, to unite to the sacrifice of the Lord's Cross the difficulties they may encounter from their condition.

#2359 Homosexual persons are called to chastity. By the virtues of self-mastery that teach them inner freedom, at times by the support of disinterested friendship, by prayer and sacramental grace, they can and should gradually and resolutely approach Christian perfection.

#2396 Among the sins gravely contrary to chastity are masturbation, fornication, pornography, and homosexual practices.